I became a psychotherapist well into the second half of my life. I have been married for thirty years and have two adult children. I have been both the primary care-giver and the sole breadwinner of my family. I have taken on many roles, from digging ditches to architectural design, from rabble-rouser to rule enforcer. I have worked beside, above and below a diverse group, from the recently arrived immigrant to the well-established business mogul. This wide range of experience informs my current work which, I believe, begins with stepping into my client’s shoes.
I use elements from many therapeutic perspectives depending on my client’s needs.
We all are parts of family systems, workplace systems, cultural systems etc. Systems have constraints, rules, expectations and history. They also provide opportunities, community, security and support. It is often helpful to explore the details of these systems to help distinguish the differences between our individual selves and any particular system.
We all have a sphere of attention that expands and contracts depending on circumstances and habit. When we expand this sphere to include more aspects of ourselves and those who live in our systems, we give ourselves the opportunity to deliberately choose how we will respond to the challenges in front of us.
We all have patterns of behavior; habits, quirks, preferences and judgments. Sometimes, these don’t work well and we consider altering them or adopting new ones. With appropriate tools and practice, we have a tremendous capacity to alter these patterns.
With clarity of the systems we live in, an ability to focus moment to moment on ourselves and those around us, and skills for managing our own behavior we maximize our potential for improving our lives and the lives of those around us.